The times and thoughts of an aircraftengine mechanic

Yup it’s finally here….

That special time of the year…. season of joy, love and rebirth (flowers/trees…… not reincarnation!).

At this time of year I compare the calender to a big giant board of days off from work. Think about it. In Norway we got the standard holy days, easter and so on… In addition we got them local and national holidays.

1st of May…. the workers day…. what a nice day to work….. don’t you think? Okay so in the old days people fought to get this day off. They would walk in parades, scream their meanings on to everybody else, complain about sexual differences and so on……

17th of May.

Norwegian Independence day! Hurray!!!!!!!!! Now this day almost looks like a big giant day picked straight out of an old soviet parading day….. but it’s not…. We all walk around in the streets waving flags, singing songs, waving more flags, showing off nice old cars, waving even bigger flags, the children eat icecream and wave flags at the same time, people relax with realives and good friends in houses and gardens stuffed full with flags.

Yup… we love our flag…. you must have noticed that by now?

Then we have foreigners comingto Norway and not understanding a single thing of what the h*ll we are doing, no offence but by foreigners I mean Swedish people (no offence). Every year we have some swedes driving onto Norway on this, and for some strange reason they always seem to end up in the middle of a parade….WHY!?

Anyway, no matter how many times they do this, they always wonder: "What the fuck are all these people doing in the streets waving flags!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!"

Ok, by now you should get the meaning of this thread:

"FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! GET SOME INFORMATION ABOUT CULTURE AND HABITS BEFORE YOU ENTER A FOREIGN COUNTRY!!!!!!"

So I finally thought it was about time to gt a new mobile phone. Maybe just a hint that my old phone simply didn’t get any signal at all when I am at home…

I finally desided on the Sony Ericksson W800i

Don’t ask why… I mostly just use it to call…

Then it strikes me… What’s wityh ll the extra features on this "thing"? I am pretty sure that within not to long time we will reach the point where mobile phones stop being phones. They will rather turn into a portable gaming system. Rather we will read this in the commercials:

"The new XXXXXXXXX XCT12000 system with revolutionary new graphics and expanded memory. This system is so revolutionary that it will blow your mind. Extra minor features: May also be used as a phone…"

Mark my words! That day will come!

How is it that every time I sit down to make a serious post on some website during my lunch, some "dude" called HAL comes and pesters me…

He comes with expressions like this: "Javel, e du løyen?" "Yes, well are you funny"?

"Jeg kan en sang som går deg på nervene", "I know a song that makes you go nuts…" and he repeats it like 145000 times….

"What’s the deal with the law of Arcimedes? When you submerge an object in water it repels an amout of water similar to its own mass"…. but not this guy… he sais: "When I submerge my body in any body of water……………the phone rings…."

Ok, here’s my therory of the day:

"In the beginning there was only darkness, the Lord arrived, he said: "Let there be light!" And it started burning everywhere…

Ok this has bothered me for a few years…

How is it that everytime you drop anything on the floor, especially a sandwich with some gooey stuff on, it always drops with the sticky side down?

After much consideration I come to this theory, "The theory dropping stuff"

Ok, I’m pretty sure that when you drop something like a sandwich on the floor there are many variables that contribute to the outcome, these variables are defines as this:

Height of the dropper

The value of the carpet or surface the object falls towards

Stickyness of the topping

The scale of work it involves in point from 1-10 to remore the stain

Your level of irritation or agitation on a level from 1-10

Your annual income

Your luck on a scale from 1-100

By adding all these variables together in some way, I’m sure that you will eventually come forth to a sertain percentage  value of how high the possebility is that you will drop the sandwich with the top side down. I’ll get back with a more specific explanation later…